Wohoo! Awesome. really liked it alot. At least this time round, the shirt was much better than last year. Hope tmr i will have the chance to wear it. Cause i will be wearing my full u instead! Urgh.

Tmr morning have to wake up like 5.15am, so that i can reach school by 6.15am and prepare everything. Must be done by 6.45am. But i really pray hard that everything will go smoothly.

OMG. im really down and out now. I cant take it. My legs are super suan now.

Had speech day rehearsal and prize winner thingy today!! Really tiring. Had to run here and there.

Sometimes, i really think am i that idiotic and bastard?! I just dun make things done correctly.

Im on the verge of falling down. But after that, do i still have the strength to stand on my feet again? I really think that probably im just not up to that standard to do some things.

I wonder how many people hate me alot.

Im really thinking hard lately. Was thinking while eating dinner all by myself :(

Some things cannot be forced anymore. I think the situation aint improving at all..Its tearing apart.

Shall go rest now. Really tired.

If i were to fall down, who would be there to help me? :(

Well, i cant really rmbr what has been going on lately..but all i know, the week before was disastrous..pathetic..i hope this week will be much better..

Really tough schedules we have for sec 4s -.- no time to let our hair down at all..

When there is time for us to rest, the duration is just too short.. -.-

Well, i have been thinking... Does perseverance and determination lead to success??

If i ever wanna talk to you bout some stuffs..would u allow??

The promise all this while, probably from my mindset..it still exists..

But looking from the situations and reality, does it? Can the promise still be carried out?

Shall end here..Shall study biology or continue with SS..

my memory is not really functioning well for this week..dunno why..

Feeling really tired, dun wanna think of so many stuffs..Have no mood to do anything..I just wanna close my eyes..And think of nothing..Down and out..

Wednesday, had PE in the morning..Really can't take it! Feel like taking a chopper and become a murderer..Seriously, i cant take it during PE lesson..There is never a smile on his face when he is with my class..What's wrong with him?! Everytime, also not happy..Why of all does it have to be .....?? and worst thing, is with my class!! OMG!!

Well, received a msg on wednesday..really shocked when i saw it..Well, gonna settle some stuffs on saturday..Clarify some things..I think its time the truth comes to light and know the truth of some stuffs..It boils down all to my own doings..im ashamed..but i wanna to clear the whole mess and make things better..But can all these happen? I wonder..

Tmr have biology..gonna practice for spa..Chemistry gonna study electrolysis..Really hope i have the energy to study and after assembly, got chinese paper to do!! Urgh!! have to really sit down and concentrate..Cant just play with it around my fingers..

Well, saw the board on who are the winners for speech day!! Wohoo!! Deborah, Eli, Ho yang, Hilary and Shawn are getting awards too!! Congrats! to you all! Sorry if i have left out anyone else whom i know..thats all that i can rmbr.. i got Best in cadet for sjab and some award for community service..dunno whats that for..so yea..

I decided to do my duty totally without playing..i dun wanna u to feel left out alone there..So yea..sometimes sacrifices are needed to make things go smoothly..so yea do good luck! :)

Well gonna rest for now, shall study later..cant waste anymore time..

Urgh! tmr gonna have oral exam..really worried for it..Well, good luck to all my friends too :)

Haix..things aint looking good at all lately..dunno why..

Well should stop here for now..

Hope they are able to achieve well for that competition..

Yeap, its 12.24am now..Supposedly im need to be down at HQ but probably, i should stay at home and finish up my homework and study..Can't lose anymore time..Its saturday!! Arr..

Still need to study for all the subjects too..

im really thinking..When will things start to turn out good again? I need those moments now..

Im really confused with what have happened recently..

Yeap! Tmr no more lessons..But i have to go to school for some CCA!! Arr..It aint a holiday at all..

Nvm ba..at least got footdrill to teach :) Hahaha..

Well, had e maths lesson today! Finally finished vectors..A maths lesson! seriously, im really worried for that subject..I couldnt even understand the chapter teacher is teaching right now..RATE OF CHANGE..really confusing..before the chapter, was equations of tangent, normal and curve..alittle confused..probably the next few days before school reopens, i should really sit down and mug real bad.. I cant neglect my studies anymore! From the results, i know i have dropped.. Must buck up! JYJY to all my friends..

Urgh!! I think my first priority right now is my studies..well, feelings and other stuffs have to be put aside..But still deeep down in my heart, nothing changes..

Omg! the holiday is getting over one day after another..And i haven even touch my homework! It may be a few subjects..But actually, it a pile! Arr..probably should force myself to start doing later..I cant waste anymore time.. ANd start revising!! OMG really need someone to push me to study..Haix..im kinda depressed with my life..the day is just passing so fast..OR Is it me that im not cherishing every minute and second of my time in my school..

Yeap, today went to ngee ann city to watch the dance showcase thingy..Woo!! Real nice ! from my point of view. Yeap, Our school modern dancers were really wonderful! Good Job ppl! Another one was from woodgrove primary school..Hahaha..They were super awesome! Hahaha..Really amazed by their dance..Hahaha..Another one was from Ahmad Ibrahim sec school..Hahaha..Quite nice too! can see that Mithren was opening his mouth real big..Hahaha..either he was just too shocked by how they danced or drooling..hahahaha..there were many more..but i think these three were the ones that shocked me..so yea..

Sometimes whatever i have done, would u appreciate? Well, i dun mind actually..cause i dun wanna anything in return..i just wanna help you when u are in need that's all..

i wonder how are you right now..Yeap, tmr u have camp le..Good luck..all the best..take care..IMY :) i wanna talk to you but..

Im really dumb to do things before i do it..How retarded can i be..If only i had done the right thing..all this cold war wouldnt be happening right now..There's nothing i can do now..

I can understand why it takes a few seconds to lose trust in someone but takes a few donkey years to earn it back again.. Once broken, no matter how much u mend it back..the "scar" will always remain there..

Till now, i have plenty of regrets in my life..i really dunno how to face myself, let alone facing others..

I really wanna make things be much better than now but how am i gonna to do that? That's the question.. I think somehow i really feel like an asshole.. Nahh..

Things between us last week were so much better than now..I dunno what happened..Suddenly that coldness between us began to start between us again this week..I hope it will be different next week..I dunno why things are like this..I hate like it!! Arr.. If only those moments where we talk to each other so happily can happen again..

I hate when good moments just happen for awhile and those bad moments have to appear for so long!! c'mon.. Why can't things be better? i know life is full of ups and downs.. I need more ups right now..im struggling myself thru all those "downs"..

This march holiday aint one at all for me and my sec4 friends..Till friday, i have to attend school!

However, I think its time for me to start studying already...Really bad..

Seriously, only when i see that smile on your face..the day seems much better for me..IMY:)

U seem very different from last week..cheer up aite..

Sometimes i really think whatever i say and do, will it really help much? im willing to help out but....

Well, im still thinking if should i go help my officer be a mascot at junction 8 and earn 100bucks within 2days!!

Well, yesterday, spent the whole day outside. Had to rush down to HQ to help out in the trainings for my FAC members..OMG! im really sitting on the fence right now.. Was told to go for AA but should i go or not?!?! i really don't know.. i think my academics is much much more important..After that, went down to Kampong Glam, Suntec City, Marina Square and Clarke Quay..My legs were extremly exhausted can!!! Couldnt walk properly at all..supposedly, at clarke quay, wanted to buy that turkish ice cream again! But they increased the price to $5 for one! Isnt that expensive?! Didnt buy at all..Three of us managed to find food for ourselves only 9plus k! ?Really crowded.. Suntec city having the IT fair! THATS WHERE I GOT MY NEW LAPTOP!! HAHAHA (:

Anyway, got back my common test results..Had only 4As..But what im most happy bout is my chinese!! My actual target is C5 but apparently, i got B4!!! Super happy.. People!! good luck for your upcoming MYE and oral k!! (: JYJY..

Haix..Its just our mind..imagining stuffs that doesnt seems realistic to happen...

Aite, very short post for now..Haven done my files and chinese paper!! Urgh..I really wanna rest my mind or awhile..But when that happens, im lack behind..not just alittle..but ALOT!

Well, had my first physics SPA..i think i cropped up most of the stuffs..Really bad..Haix..

How am i still gonna carry out my biology and Chemistry! arr!

Have to look on the bright side on life then..

CCA wise, FDI cancelled cause of some matter happening in HQ..So sad..

Yeap had that speech day parade rehearsal!! became the sjab platoon commander..Sometimes i think i should let this position off..It seems to be shorter than last year de..Probably last yr got that skating thingy..Well, NPCC became Parade Commander.. Congrats..National Day probably is GB le! Hahaha :)

FAC is in 11th of April!! Yes..all the way boys! JYJY le.. But worst thing is that, during march holidays..I do not only have to come back for remedials AND SPA! Arr..i also have to stay back to teach them!!

omg..GIVE ME A BREAK PLS!

Can i don't come? Im really tired.. the day seems shorter and shorter! CANT IT BE LONGER?!?

Will the national day parade be my last one?

IF ONLY THE WORLD CAN STOP FOR A MOMENT..

I will hold that promise till the end..I know i broke it once..ONE last time i have to cherish it no matter how its like.. BUt still, whats the outcome?

And apparently, next tuesday..i will having my First physics SPA!! urgh..

Im really worried bout how im gonna fare.. Pray hard i will be able to do well, inclufing my friends

JYJY :)

Had chemistry spa..Didnt really have the mood to do anything yesterday..

And they still had to give us do o lvl chinese paper!! Didnt finish it completely..

For the SPA Practice, was doing the speed of reation experiment..Well! Broke 1 measuring cylinder! :)

Heard so that there will be parade for speech day! Really looking forward..Hope it comes true..

Its my last year in this school..wanna finish up my secondary life with one or more last parade..

I wanna strive hard for my drills..yea..FDI, when will it come? im not sure whether i should continue my Sjab life after i graduate. probably 60%.

yea, i saw ur post..Life have been kinda of tough for u lately..Sometimes letting out all ur sorrows will be the best remedy.. im willing to listen ur sorrows.. im really worried for u.. Take care..

Cheer up soon k!! Be happy.. I may not be able to taste the bitterness of your life..but im sure i know how u feel right now.. And, one more thing..make sure u take care of your health too k..

do eat at regular timing.. pls..

Need not use my mom phone anymore..Really troublesome..

And that caused me to be late for school just because of the poor alarm clock!! urgh..

My phone is like much much better! But the bad thingy is that they took out my screen guard!! Its 12 bucks! :( Wohoo..

Okay talking bout school first, well..Today had no lesson but just a trip down to NP! Omg..seriously, its really interesting..Hahahaha..Went for the biomedical egineeering course..i think..Hahaha..Saw my friend, Han lun! Hahaha..Really nice guy..Yeap, he helped me out for the ECG experiment..Really cool..And the lecture was kinda nice..Had a great time!

Well, the best part was bout the Magic of science! OMG..Really fun..I bet that lecturer was a physics teacher..Hahahaa..If we can have a teacher like him in our school, I think it would be very awesome! Yeap, even though we noticed some faults during the magic but his words were really nice..Awesome trip!! :)

After that, had to do the world maths day thingy..then went to practice the dance..Hahaha..Really tired..

Tmr have to resume normal lessons already! Haix..Pray that i have the energy to study..

Haix..Im really confused..

I knew its cant ever happen again.. feeling hopeless..

Would some stuffs just stay in the past forever or could u bring it into the future?

Anyway had the health checkup thingy today..Had to check my backbone..its positive!! Urgh..Heard so, positive aint good..Haix.. Dunno how..

Yeap, received my english results today! 19/30! still not satisfied..duhh..Must work harder!

Geography and ss tmr..Pray hard...

Heard bout some stuffs, and im wondering why you come to a sudden decision and u didnt even talk to me first bout it? If u have told me things earlier, the outcome might have been different.

Yeap, Supposed some stuffs are to happen..but somehow due to important matters to attend to, It cant happen..so yea..

I really have been frustrated bout some stuffs lately..Haix..

I sick and tired of some stuffs..My CCA! For the FAC team, its not complete just cause one person..Super arrogant can! Even learnt how to talk back to seniors..one day, if he should do that again, i make sure he wont get off so easily anymore..And one more thing, if officers come back, i dun wanna come le..cause they can teach!! I need my days to be free too! Wanna rest u know =.=

Another thingy, i really want it to happen again..but somehow, why do people and things have to change?? I really miss the good old days..If everything can move back to the past, i would be much more happy..At least, it will be much better than now..Urgh..WHY do things have to happen like that?! I wanna repent!! Unable to forgive myself..If at that time, i knew this would happened..i wouldnt have done that at all..All i know that hoping for a miracle to happen aint a easy thing anymore..

Well, tmr is your drill test stage 3 already..Good luck k! Im very sure u can do it..JYJY!! :)

Really disappointed with myself.. I FAILED MY CHEMISTRY! Wtf.

The others are just like borderline?!?!?

Chemistry: 18/40 =.=

Biology: 26/40

Physics: 26/40

E maths: 31/40

This is so depressing..Shall buck up!! JYJY!!

To those my friends who are going for competition tmr, ALL THE BEST!! GOOD LUCK:)

Well gonna be a short post..nothing much..

Haix..just realised im really a poor commander..Really poor..Wtf! Im going for my FDI soon..

How am i going to fare sia?!?!? I must pass!! Urgh..

Yeap sorry bout today..i did badly in teaching you..~Failure~ :(

Well, hope tmr ur two seniors is able to help u much more than i can do..All the best k!! U can do it for your drill test! JYJY.. :) good luck.. ILY:)